24 months -- 2!

Our baby has been TWO for a few weeks now -- and it's so surreal.

Little lady.

I know I've said it a million times, but it honestly feels like she was just born. I remember it all so vividly. I'm not sure where the months went, but I've enjoyed SO much of our past two years!

Her birthday party was so sweet. Thank you, family and friends, for coming! We stuck with last year's game plan and did a brunch, but I've probably mentioned that already. Quiche and fruit and homemade cinnamon rolls and sausage and home fries ... followed by doughnuts instead of birthday cake? I think this will be our route from here on out. Who doesn't love breakfast?

Doughnut "cake!"

Ana seemed to SORT OF get that it was her birthday, most of the time. She was "cited!" about opening presents. She smeared doughnut frosting on her face in a stereotypical birthday baby move. And now we have 10x the toys! My Aunt Laurie suggested cycling some of this stuff in and out over the coming months, and we're definitely gonna do that.

Even like, for Christmas, Ana didn't seem that into her easel that James and I bought -- it was ALL about her new baby doll and her Elmo slippers -- so he was like, "this will be fun come spring! Let's just say she never saw it and put it back in the basement."

Done and done.

So yeah, her birthday was Dec. 8, we took her to Crossroads Village to ride the train (she loved it!), then out to eat with Meese and Bob, which I think will (or has?) become a tradition. Her party was the next day and then we just got through Christmas.

On the train!

I think the close timing on everything was a little confusing though; she saw the pile of gifts on Christmas Eve and started singing "Happy birthday to youuuu," and then tried to tear into everyone's presents at some point. I was like, "Um, hello miss! Not all those are for you this time around!" lol.

But she seemed to kind of "get" Christmas ... at least, way more than she did last year! (Can you believe this was her THIRD Christmas?)  Anyway, now she knows about Santa (and says "ho ho hooo!"), loves our tree, the "yights" and the "orn-mets" and she's finally more into what's inside the wrapping paper -- as opposed to JUST being jazzed about the paper itself. This was a really fun year, overall!

We did Christmas Eve with the Ortlieb-Berouseks, came back to my parents' and hung out, we WERE gonna do church and dinner, but Ana's nap ran long -- so we just ordered takeout and skipped church altogether (bad Christians, sorry!)  And then we opened gifts with my parents and brother around 8p or so. The three of us Ganleys were going to stay the night, kind of like last year, but we thought it would be fun to have Ana open gifts at our house for the first time on Christmas morning. I lovvvve our front room! We were all set up in there with a real tree and everything.

The only downside was, the drive home on Christmas Eve took FOREVER because it had snowed a bunch, the plow game on I-75 was WEAK, and then we got Ana to bed and I felt so exhausted and sick all of a sudden.  :(

But not all heroes wear capes: James prepped a breakfast casserole for the next morning, wrapped EVERYTHING of Ana's and set up for the next morning, unloaded the car, cleaned the house ... all while I took a steaming hot shower and passed out in a pile of my own drool. I woke up and I was like, "WHO DID THIS?"  AH, it looked incredible in here. He is the best husband and dad.

Proof.

Anyway, Ana got up around 9:30, we did Christmas like we intended, then Ana and I got back in the  car and did a brunch-type thing with the Mahon side of the family -- in Birmingham. Again, it took a longggg time to get into town -- we've been absolutely pummeled with snow lately!

I worked my final shift of 2017 that evening, Ana had an absolute ball running around Aunt Laurie's house with different cousins, and then we slept over at my parents'. James couldn't come to any of it, unfortch, as he had to work (and be physically present in the newsroom).   :(

We missed our fav guy!

And that was Christmas.

We have the nicest family. I'm so grateful for them. And it was great that Uncle Robby could come down, too -- he's not always able to get the holidays off either, based on his job. Speaking of which, his birthday is today, as well.

ANYWAY, back to the Anz part of this blog ... I can't even stress how happy we are to be in Michigan. For her sake and our own! The cold temps kind of suck rn, but like, we're just so lucky to be surrounded by relatives and love. I can't imagine Ana growing up without her tribe. I'm sure we would have made it work, because we wouldn't have had another option, but this has been just perfect.

Anz, experiencing snow for the first time this season

Analisa was so much fun with everyone over the hols. There's truly never a dull moment, and in big group settings, we were even just saying, we've never had to like, remove her. She's honestly happy the whole time, she goes with the flow, she eats whatever we eat, she plays with anyone up for it (even getting a little bossy at times, forcing my cousin Sarah to "run. Runnnnn!") and she's such a delight. She's even been getting a little less shy these days ... her warm-up period around "new" people (or people she doesn't see often) used to be maybe a half-hour. Now it's like, give her a few minutes and she's good!

She loves to yell, "I've got it!" and do things all on her own. She's very independent, but in the best way possible.

Of course, she has her moments at home when it's just the three of us, when she can be a little difficult -- but mostly, you just have to get more and more inventive when it comes to distractions or changing her surroundings or snapping her out of it. It's def not as easy as it used to be. But in no way would I say the terrible 2s have arrived. (And yes, I've been warned that sometimes with girls, 3 can be worse).

But I'm pretty convinced her personality really is THIS loving. She loves us, Meese and Bob, her sitters, her "fwens," and she's even asking about more and more people every day. "Tweesa? Laurie? Carol?" for example.

She tells us what she wants. Her vocabulary is honestly so impressive. She makes sure her needs are met and she shows so much love! It melts me.

Cutie cutes!

She'll still fight a nap a few days a week, but she takes more than she skips, so we'll accept that.

We switched pediatricians and THAT'S a story for another day, but the moral from our first visit is that we like the doctor herself -- and Ana continues to be the healthiest, which is what matters.

Every other day, she changes her vote on whether the baby in my "belly" is a boy or a girl. Haha. Just tonight, she said "boy" pretty confidently. But I swear, a day or two ago, she was back to girl. I guess we won't know till we know! Her bag is all packed, and she's ready to go to Meese and Bob's, for whenever that day arrives.  :)

I've had like, 99 problems throughout the end of this pregnancy, I swear. My latest is that the baby's head is so low that (s)he's causing nerve pain in my hip flexors -- on the right side especially. I'm happy to report (s)he's moved just a touch since last week, which alleviated some of the pain and pressure, but I'm still pretty ... sore. And I'm not as mobile as I'd like. I'm also not supposed to lift Ana or do stairs (lol). I was in tears last week, just hauling Ana from my SUV, up my parents' front steps and into the house. That was really bad. And my right leg like, just wasn't even working for some time.

I was all, "It can't be like this for the final few weeks, can it?" And the doctor was like, "Actually, yep!"

OMG.

Anyway, like I said, it shifted a bit, but now I have this gross cold. It's not the worst thing that's ever happened, but like, I really don't want to be in the process of delivering, which is already uncomfortable af, and unable to breathe. Because that's the current sitch: I'm stuffed up, I have a sore throat and sometimes I get super hot and then super cold.

Fun, I know. Home stretch! I'll be 39 weeks as of Thursday.

So yeah, I'm straying off course again, but this is what's up at the moment! We have a 2-year-old, she's a lot of work -- thank goodness for my huzb and my parents -- a baby en route any day and we're READY. (Ish). But like I've said before, I think Ana will be the best big sister. No doubts about that, actually. I've continued to tear up about it a bit, just because it's a big transition, but like, we're so excited for all that's to come.

Some days it seems overwhelming too, but moms survive this all the time! We got this. We're so lucky for that little Anzy girl and we're elated to meet No. 2. Even if it will involve a whole bunch of stuff that I've forgotten, like boob pain and sleepless nights and pump parts and cradle cap :)

Thank you for reading two years worth of baby updates, broken down by month! Like I've mentioned, I'll continue to write, but probably not as regularly. But we could be diving into some more FUN topics too, so expect plenty of that!

xoxo, and thanks for being my people.

To my daughter on her second birthday.

Dec. 8, 2017

To my sweet Analisa,

It was exactly two years ago when we first met. The doctors lifted you up, told me you were a girl and set you on my chest. I fed you. I rubbed that weird white stuff -- vernix? -- into your delicate skin. I inhaled your sweet scent, and then exhaled, relieved that the past 24 hours could start becoming a distant memory. Labor wasn't as horrible as everyone made it sound, but it was HARD. (But ever so worth it).

We locked eyes and you were mine in an instant. It was like I knew you already, and maybe I did. I knew your kicks, and what your hiccups felt like from the inside, and I knew without even thinking twice that you were my baby, and that would never change.

It WILL never change.

You have a new baby brother or sister on the way, my sweet girl, but know this: You will always be my first baby. You taught me how to be a mom.

Even in the simplest of places around the house, I'm taken back to our earliest memories together -- even if we weren't in this house, per se. But some days I'll just be tidying up and I'll pass by the brown couch. I transformed into a mom on that couch, usually sitting on the far left side, wedged up against those cozy pillows, with your tiny body in my arms.

We must have spent WEEKS on that couch, maybe even months, if you added all the time together: nursing, trying to nurse more successfully, sometimes losing a few tears over it all, eventually bottle-feeding, or just sharing a quiet moment between the two of us. Like me, holding you or rocking you. Or singing "Landslide" by Fleetwood Mac for the 40th time that day. (Are you sick of that song yet? You can tell me now).  ;)

We shared that couch with Daddy, too, SO often in the early days. Just the three of us, getting snuggly. And we filled the space with books and blankets and your giggles, and probably some crumbs from various snacks, as well. (We'll have to get rid of that couch sooner rather than later, I think).

We've tackled these past two years together, my Ana. You learned how to be a baby -- that "fourth trimester" is tough, right? -- and I learned how to be your mama. Some days, you'd cry. One day, I cried with you, and whispered that I didn't know how to do it, either. I felt a little lost at times, although I've always tried to stay confident, no matter what. It's easy to take all of the advice, and none of the advice, all at the same time.

Still, I remember once, sitting in my grandma's empty-feeling condo, missing James, who was adjusting to the new job and long newsroom hours, wondering if I was doing OK with the whole "new mom" gig. We had uprooted our lives for this move to Michigan, I had left my career (and probably still had some post-partum hormones flowing through), and it was just ... such a transitional time for everyone.

But I feel like you've always understood, on some weird, intrinsic level. Maybe that sounds crazy. But even when you were upset and I'd ask you to dance it off with me, I feel like you got the hang of it -- like, that's just who your weirdo mom was. You went with it. You are so loving and easygoing.

We tackled each day together. Some were easier than others, but most included naps -- and naps are the best, aren't they? Those make everything better.

I felt so good when I woke up one day and realized how much you seemed to trust me. And James, of course. You really are our girl.

I hope you know you can always trust Daddy and me. Even though you'll never REALLY remember the early days, I hope they brought you comfort and security.

We've had the absolute happiest days: Your first giggle. Your first belly laugh. First steps. This summer, your first scraped knees (although, we also started the game "who's gonna kiss baby's boo-boo?", which added a silver lining). Days at the park, or strolling the mall ... or just sharing a snack with you in the kitchen, making silly faces at each other. I can't say I've loved EVERY moment -- after all, you went through a phase where you'd scream when the yogurt ran out -- but I've loved about 99% of our time. You are the best baby. You're growing into the best toddler. And I can't wait to see what kind of girl you become.

I wouldn't change a thing.

And from here, I want you to continue growing up with everything we've tried to provide early on: mainly, comfort and security. You're so smiley and kind to people. I don't doubt that that'll continue. I hope you find friends who make you the happiest version of yourself. Keep bringing me books. (One day, you can read to me!) Keep learning. Keep counting. Never stop dive-bombing into our arms, or sneaking up on me with an "o-prize!" (surprise), or striking up boisterous songs with mama at the grocery store.

One day maybe you'll go to college -- or you won't. One day maybe you'll marry a wonderful man or woman -- or you won't. There will never be pressure from us. People live a million different ways, and I trust that you're going to be incredible no matter what. I trust you to live your life in the way you see fit.

And if you wake up one morning and come to terms with the fact that you've picked or done something that no longer brings you joy, I hope you have the strength to rewrite your story. It's never too late, my baby. I am with you. We are with you.

I am so proud to know you, so grateful to spend so much time with you, and SO lucky to be the one you call "mama." It's by far my best title yet.

I'm in awe of the tiny person you're becoming. You'll always be my baby first, my friend second, and I hope you know that nothing you could do would EVER drive me away. You and me and daddy: We embody unconditional love to the fullest.

Keep being you. (We'll work on limiting the fruit snacks, over time). I hope you know how much joy you've brought to our lives.

I love you, bear -- a bushel and a peck.

Love,

Your mama

23 months!

Miss Ana-bear, Ana-boo and Ana-babe is 23 months!

Well, she's turning 2 in three days. So per usual, I'm doing her monthly update way late.

She is ... CUTER THAN EVER (said me, every month). Photographic evidence follows:

Posing like such a little lady.

Seriously though. James and I dropped her off with Grandma Leese and Grandbob a few weeks ago while we ran up to Whole Foods for our quarterly splurge, and she fell asleep there, as we expected her to. Jim and I grabbed a bite afterward and we didn't get back to RO until probably 9 or 9:30. So we picked her up out of the Pack n Play, transferred her (half-asleep) to the car and started driving back home. (I call this "Von Trapping," as in, the Von Trapp family, per Sound of Music -- when you sneak off into the night). Anyway, we were backing out of the driveway, evading Nazis, etc., when we just heard this tiny, sleepy little voice say in a near-whisper, "Bye, Meese. Bye, Bob."

Is that not the sweetest thing?

She'll do the same thing with "friends." ... "Bye Dipsy!" she shouts to her green "Tubby" as we leave my parents' house each Wednesday morning.

Or James and Ana will be playing at Target while I shop, and Anz will find me in an aisle and go, "MAMA! MAMA! HI! HI!" And she runs up to me with such vigor and love. Omg, it warms my heart.

Just today, we were eating McDonalds (I'm mom of the year over here, I know), and I said, "Look Ana! You've got fries and mama's got fries!" She thought about it long and hard for a minute, then gave me a sassy little head shake, lifted her fry to mine and said, "CHEERS!"

And we clinked fries. OMG. I was laughing so hard!

I shouldn't be *that* impressed by all these little things, though.

I mean, girlfriend's basically speaking in sentences most days. Here are a few: "I did it!"  "I like Street!" (Street is Sesame Street, for reference). "Here you go!"  "What happened?"  "Where's Daddy?"  (Or when I tell her I'm gonna come get her: "I'll get YOUUU!") James and I keep lol'ing at that last one. She said it to me when she was strapped into her car seat, so I was like, "COME TRY ME, BEAR!"

Live bear!

She loves the concept of family, too. "Mama, dada, Ana, FAMY."

The other day, I even asked, "Who else is going to be in our family pretty soon?" And I kid you not, Emily as my witness, she replied, "BABY!" I went on to ask her if it would be a boy or a girl, and she said "SISTER" pretty clearly. Again, no exagg! Emily was THERE. We clarified and she said, "girl!"

Then the next morning, James asked her the same thing, and she stuck with her gut: "Seester!" She wants us to name her Juicy. <--- lolol

It was only a few hours later that she changed her vote and started saying brother. (We'll name him "Cider," she says).  Still, we're at 2 votes from Ana that it's a girl, vs. 1 vote that it's a boy. So who knows.

... I can't believe it's Dec. 5. (Also, this was my due date with Ana!)

My due date for #2 is less than a month away. I'm on weekly ob-gyn appointments. The baby will be here like, SOON. Is that surreal for anyone else? (S)he feels so much higher up this time. I was woken up this morning by some really high kicks to the rib cage. I was like, "How did you even get UP there?" I realize it's just the feet, but ... hmmm. And ouch.

We're pretty excited over here! (Not that we've done much around the house. We'll get there, right?) Just gotta get through Ana's birthday.

Beep beep!

Changing gears, back to the ANA part of our Ana blog, for about the fifth or sixth time now, James and I have been all, "K this is finally it. She's getting sick. Let's take her temperature and finally buy a nose Freida and get into high gear." Two weekends ago, after almost a full work week spent living at my parents' for the holiday, Anz seemed so stuffy and run down, once we finally returned home. She even slept with us (basically on top of me, which is comfortable when you're 34 weeks pregnant), one night, which was just like, the worst.*

*I mean, I obviously love looking over at that little face, and she seemed to actually sleep in our bed, unlike in her crib. But I had no space to myself, she was waking up with tears on the hour, and it was all just so unlike her.  :(

So the next morning, Anz and I shared plenty of cuddles on the couch, I got her to eat some breakfast, we played quietly for a bit and I put her down for her afternoon nap a little earlier than usual -- just as a test.

(Also, we had tried to take her temp, but I could only find her pacifier thermometer, which she kept fiddling with and spitting out. We got every reading from 93 degrees to 103 degrees. Naturally, we were like, "Whatever, let's deal with it later," and never got around to it). She did feel hot. I Motrined her on two separate occasions.

... But anyway, yeah. This is where her sick story ends. Because she honestly woke up from her nap completely cured and back to her crazy little self.

Maybe it was the Motrin? It hadn't even been 24 hours of the yuckies. Or maybe we were RIGHT at the one-day mark? Regardless, Anz woke up and was just like, "I'm baaaack!" Jumping in her crib, acting nuts, no longer feeling warm to the touch, no more stuffiness, full of energy and life.

Like I said, this has been our experience her entire life with the bear getting "sick."

She'll be kind of symptomatic for anywhere from an hour to a day, and then just as we think to investigate further, she's over it. Ain't nobody got time for that. I realize she doesn't do day care, which a lot of people like to credit for her good health, but I swear, this girl has the immune system of a straight champion. And plus, just because she's not in day care ... I still take her out plenty and we're really not all that clean around here.

(I mean, we're not *religiously* clean. We obviously tidy up daily, bathe her, do all the things we're supposed to do. I just don't, say, vacuum or mop or anything regularly. James ... kind of does). Depends on the week or the month. Also, she's known to eat tomatoes off the ground at the farmers market. So go figure.

Love bug.

ANYWAY.

We also had theeeee cutest day with her, like, of all time. My days kind of run together, so I'm not sure WHEN it was, but it was within the past few weeks. Even James got into bed that night, all like, "that was the MOST FUN day! She wasn't even cranky for one second and she was so loving and sweet! I LOVE HER TO PIECES!" ... I realize it might be hard for some people to picture James all up on cloud nine over his daughter. But oh, it happens. He is such a vocal and loving husband and dad. I can't even tell you.

Anyway, Cutest Day Ever 2017 included Anz just like, bouncing between us, quite literally. She was like, running and leaping into our arms at one point. Giggles all around, just like, the happiest girl. Nothing set her off. All she wanted to do was play and love us.

I don't know HOW I was chosen to be her mom, but it makes me a little misty sometimes when I think about it too hard. I always knew I wanted to be a mom someday, but she just makes everything worth it: the sleepless nights (which are now pretty rare), the frustrating moments (which def happen), the time, the money, the effort ... she is just our absolute world. I do think we have room in our hearts for another baby (of course), but I also think #2 is gonna have to bring his or her A-game when it comes to competing with Little Miss Anz. She is such a dream. I didn't even know it was possible to have a daughter like her.

Boops!

On the parenting front, I'm still working my way through Harvey Karp! Trying to treat Ana like a person, but still keeping in mind that she's a person -- not an adult. You can't reason with her on everything. You shouldn't try to explain intricate shit if she's in the middle of a breakdown. That's just frustrating. Our world can be very overwhelming and stimulating for someone her size/age. You have to be patient, learn how to get through to her, understand where she's coming from, and be careful not to let your own experiences/trauma/pain from the past (if you have any) seep into the mix. It can be a real challenge!

The HK toddler book has also taught me a lot about adapting and modifying my own behavior, based on who exactly Ana is: Which I believe is ... easy but cautious, observant, a thinker, spirited, but not impulsive. I think back on her first steps, as in, walking -- which were taken almost a year ago. She really wasn't one to get after it and lunge away, falling left and right, perfecting her craft. She was very calculated and methodical. She didn't take on what she couldn't handle. That embodies who I think she is.

I mean, and if you're wondering what I'm getting at with all of this ... basically, it's just that you can't handle all TODDLERS with one toddler label and the perfect toddler solutions. (Well, do those even exist?) You have to consider who these tiny people are at their cores, and what might work best specifically for them.

Anyway, I'll leave you with a few fav Ana phrases as of late. So cute, you might die. Just a warning!

-- Hooray!
-- Lights! (Mostly referring to Christmas "yights")
-- New diaper! (Yes, she'll request this but is still putting up some resistance to the potty. Shrug).
-- Drawing! (Or), crayons, please!
-- No way, no way! <-- Always promising when you walk past her door during nap time and hear her chanting this
-- Ready, set, go!
-- Ready, set, jump!
(Singing the Happy Birthday song*)
-- Santa
-- Christmas
-- O-prize! (Surprise!)

-- Bless you! (Likes to bless herself)

-- Hop, hop, hop (obsessed with bunnies)
-- All aboard! (obsessed with trains) also, CHOO CHOOOOO

-- Hi mom! 

-- Hi dad! 

-- Bye buddy! 

-- High-five, buddy!

*She's so into the concept of birthdays right now, I can't WAIT for Friday and Saturday! My mom even got her a Melissa & Doug "cake" and Aunt Carol got her two birthday books -- like, both of those gifts came about a month ahead of her birthday. Really leads into the build-up! I probably should have done a theme or whatever, because she's really into trains and Sesame, but ... nah. The theme is BIRTHDAY PARTY with delicious brunch. Does that work for everyone? ;)

We're also finally changing pediatricians (no major beef, I just didn't much care for our last doctor, and I figure you should like the person if you're gonna have two kids), anddddd Ana went to the Detroit Zoo for the first time. WORTH IT! We've been waiting for the zoo entrance fee to pay off. I didn't wanna take her if she couldn't enjoy it. It was like magic, you guys. If you have a toddler, now is the time! Take that baby to the zoo.

My forever baby.

OK, I've rambled long enough (says me, every time).

See you when Ana's 14 for her 24-month update! ;)

PS we got our first Christmas tree. I'll tell you all about it next time!