5 thoughts I had during this week's crazy-as-shit Bachelor episode

*Not my photo -- took from Bach Twitter

1.) Chris definitely threw it in Britt, who apparently hasn't showered since receiving the first impression rose. So that's sanitary and wholesome.

2.) Sanderson Poe will be the name of my firstborn or my first dog, whichever comes first. "It's my story. I love my story. Isn't my story amazing?" WHAT.

3.) We just sat through two hours of show and there's no elim? They better cut bitches Red Wedding style next week, for reals. To be continued? I CAN'T.

4.) Megan is ... a racist ri-tard.

5.) Chris just seems like a weird doucher. Despite being technically hot, he's just ... unattractive. And boring and uninterested. NEXTTTTTTTT.

*This episode sponsored by the New Mexico Tourism Bureau.
*And I believe there was a typo in the group invitation title, Let's Come Together. Just think on that one for a bit and let me know.